Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I am one with the molecules
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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