69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
