WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
