i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
