I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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