I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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