it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
And then he peed in my hair
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
