It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
