My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
