these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
