look no pants
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
