You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
