And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
