I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
