Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
