Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
