The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
