that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
These tits shall not be calmed
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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