if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Randomize
