His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
