Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
