All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
