I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Drunk walkin through police station. America
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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