yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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