i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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