Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize