My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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