why didn't you poke me back
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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