Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
