I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
