the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Randomize
