In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
try to milk me bitch
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