1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I know her cup size but not her name....
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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