After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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