everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
As shirtless as possible
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I believe in your delicious
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
