she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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