There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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