its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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