i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
