Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
