ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
