Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
