It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
