stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
