i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
