What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
