The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
