I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
