Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
