who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize