i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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